We might as well call this confessions of a hardcore paleo dieter. Whether you know me personally or not, you’d probably think that a person who runs a site like this is pretty strict about the Paleo diet. Most of the time I am, but there are times when I have to let loose and just enjoy some food products of the 21st century. This weekend was a good case in point.
Before I went Paleo, things like pizza, pasta, milk and cereal, and sandwiches were staples in my diet. I am a cyclist, after all. And then there were pancakes. One of favorite things to do Saturday mornings was wake up and make fresh pancakes. The only saving grace of these things is that I made them fresh with eggs and high fat milk, and smothered them in butter, but also lots of fake syrup. Pancakes are one food from my prior life that I really miss. Once in a blue moon, I cheat and cook some up. This undeniable craving comes around about once every 3 months or so.
Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of physical labor remodeling one of my rentals. I typically eat a decent breakfast, work all day until 8pm, then eat a modest dinner. Because of my paleo ways, I don’t really get hungry or think about food. Skipping lunch like this doesn’t bother me. I’ve lost weight though and am about as lean as I can remember, down to about 165 lbs (somewhere around 172 is normal). That’s a 4% drop in weight. I woke up yesterday morning after a hard days work Friday and realized that I was hungry. Real hungry. Eggs, bacon, and fruit weren’t going to cut it.
My brain had sublimally stored a radio commercial in my head that Denny’s was offering all you can eat pancakes for $4. This, my brain told me, would solve my hunger problem that day. And so I was off to Denny’s. My last encounter with pancakes left my gut feeling a little weird from all that flour, so I began a pre-emptive strike this go round drinking lots of water and coffee and ordering this quesadilla type thing that had ground beef, cheese, lettuce, and tomato to help buffer the effects of the pancakes. Not sure if this helped though since it came on a flour tortilla.
Those beautiful, fluffy, steamy, buttermilk scented cakes came out with butter spread and warm sryup and all my inhibitions were out the door. The first three were knocked out with ease and the waitress ordered up the next plate. Two more cakes came out, but they were even fluffier than the first three. My stomach was starting to feel the ill effects of these processed carbs and my brain was starting to buzz from the sugar shock to my blood stream. I’d never felt anything like this before, It was almost like a caffeine buzz, but much more intense. I imagine it is what getting drunk off of caffeinated alcoholic beverages feels like.
Needless to say, those two cakes only made things worse. I went in thinking I could knock out at least three plates, but after only 5 pancakes my stomach was hating me and my brain just felt like taking a nap even though it was dancing around. I guess since I haven’t been eating a lot lately that my stomach has shrunk a little too. I don’t know and I don’t care because I had definitely gotten way more than I had bargained for out of this ordeal and it was time to get the heck out of there. The hordes of hungry overweight customers coming in was not making me feel any better.
I felt bloated and irritable until about 5pm that day. When I went to bed my body felt inflamed and I could feel a lot of mucus in my nasal passage, making it a little hard to breath. I don’t know if this was from eating pancakes or not, but I do know that I don’t have these problems when I don’t eat them. In hindsite, all-you-can eat pancakes was a bad idea. I just don’t eat stuff like this anymore and my body is not used to it. The misery that ensued for the rest of day just wasn’t worth the joy of eating a food I thought I still loved. From now on if I’m feeling like I need some extra carbs, I’ll stick to sweet potatoe fries or maybe some Yuca hashbrowns (very tasty if you’ve never tried them). Farewell pancakes, you will be missed, but not really.